The Darkside Blogger in a Lakeside World of Turns, Tricks and Reflections.

 5 Months, 12 Days – still sober

What Mobi did – in his crazy world of missing turns and turning tricks

The Frogger is a-buzzing and never has my friend Rick’s adage, that ‘you never lose your girl, you only lose your turn’, been more true.

It’s amazing how the Darkside Telegraph gets around. Before, Frogger was a sleepy little bar, a bit off the beaten track with a few odd farangs who came and went for a beer or two throughout the day and not infrequently, there were no customers at all.

But for the past few days, it sometimes resembles a feeding frenzy at the zoo, as farangs of all shapes sizes and ages are descending on this emporium to sample its fresh supply of young ladies that have suddenly taken up residence – all of whom are  no doubt looking for the infamous ‘4 f’s: fun, frolics, fellacio and fucks….

I do hope my blog hasn’t got anything to do with this? Surely not?


Yesterday, Rick and I arrived around 6.30 pm, only to find ‘no room at the inn’ with every single lady in sight being wined and groped by disreputable looking, pot-bellied bastards who were all at least three times their age. Disgusting! To make matters worse, my good friend Bill was being caressed and kissed by none other than the latest love of my life – the gorgeous, long-legged Pat. What a bloody cheek, stealing my girl – oops – I mean my turn.

The fact that she was his girl in the first place had no bearing on my feelings of anger, resentment and downright jealousy. After all, he did ask me to take care of her a week ago when a mutual, friend – a notorious blabber-mouth – turned up at the bar. Fearing that news of his carousing might get back to his wife, he handed the lady over to me for safe keeping. Honoured to be entrusted with such a delicate task and always eager to oblige, ever since then, I have been scrupulous at keeping her very safe from all-comers, ( save Mobi). So I took it as a personal affront that in my brief absence, Bill would have the temerity to reclaim his lost property.

Recovering my composure, I looked around for the other  little thing that I had met a few a few days ago, when Bill’s Pat wasn’t around. Surely she would come running to take care of the ebullient Mobi? At first I couldn’t find her, but then I spotted her lovely little body, in a short, mini skirt and high heels which revealed those type of  tight, fleshy, 19 year old thighs that dirty old men like me die for. But, as with all the other hookers, someone was already having their wicked turn with her. The dirty bastard not only  had the effrontery to have her as his single turn, but he also had another young lovely sitting on his other side. A double turn! What a selfish c..nt! Didn’t he know there were other, whore-less punters, awaiting their turn? What a greedy, unthinking SOB!  He must have been a Brit.

So poor Mobi, with tears in his eyes, had to slum it at the bar where all he had for company was Rick and a rough looking Lady boy, who had with a voice so deep, he sounded like Paul Robeson.

But all was not lost, as I did have my new Samsung Galaxy tablet to play with, which immediately attracted quite a lot of interest from the adjacent intertwined ladies, much to the chagrin of their horny escorts. I took great pleasure in teaching some of them the finer points of touch-screen graphics, reassuring them with friendly pats on their bottoms – especially Pat’s oh so pat-able behind.

In the end, the rule of the turns will prevail, and as I had expected, as 8 pm approached, my good friend Bill had to pay up and head off homewards to his waiting wife. Pat escorted him to his car and upon her return, even the assembled bar girls were a bit surprised to see her heading straight into the arms of the waiting Mobi. I mean, she didn’t even bother to clear away the empty glasses away or go for a ‘quick break’ before moving onwards and upwards. Ah well – the irresistible allure of Mobi, now into his 66th year, is still alive and well, it would seem. Or maybe it’s his wallet?

Or maybe you could say that I was perfectly entitled to have my turn.☺

Some Mobi reflections on ‘The Arab Uprising’

The tyrannical regimes in the Middle East seem to be vying with each other to see who can go down in history as the vilest, most despicable criminals. Who can be ‘Top of the Mob’

Firstly, we have the good Colonel Gaddafi instructing his troops to go from house to house and slaughter everyone – men women and children – who dare to oppose him, and then issuing his troops with Viagra and condoms before sending them out to rape the female population at will.

Then we have the Royal Princes of Bahrain who are intent on stifling all opposition by killing, imprisoning and torturing thousands of its people, mainly the majority Shiite citizens; burning their mosques to the ground and raping and torturing female students as young as 12 years old; rounding up doctors, nurses and medics from hospitals and their homes and throwing them into jail on trumped up charges.

Similar atrocities have been perpetrated in Yemen, and even in Egypt some pretty nasty things have taken place, including the killing of unarmed protesters and the incarceration and torture of innocent citizens, but at least in Egypt the former president is now going on trial as the instigator of these criminal events.

But now, in Syria, we are watching  crimes against humanity unfold that are so shocking, that you might be forgiven for wondering whether Assad and his gang of murdering thugs didn’t sit down, and give due consideration to what they could do to their people, in order to outclass the atrocities that have been committed by other Arab regimes?

Just what new atrocities could they commit to get them to pride of place, at the top of the Arab league of criminality?

The world has watched, observed and has stood by impotently while Assad’s evil brutes have mowed down and killed innocent civilians on the streets, in their homes, with many still asleep in their beds. They have even killed the livestock and have ripped out the trees in the olive groves. And lastly, but by no means least ,they have  tortured and murdered boys as young as 14 years old with such mind-boggling and sadistic cruelty ;  severing their genitals, burning their faces, cutting off limbs and so on, that you wonder if these people are human at all. The situation is so dire that the terrified Syrian population, in fear for their very lives, are fleeing in their thousands to neighbouring Turkey, where thankfully, the Turks at least are providing shelter and succour.

It fascinates and horrifies me with equal measure to hear how these regimes seek to justify their despicable acts. Invariably, they blame foreigners; even Egypt tried to make those claims in the early days.  Al Qaeda is also a popular target to blame. They never, for one moment, concede that they have any kind of popular uprising in their country – no, it is always the actions of a very tiny minority of western-sponsored, criminal terrorists, who are just out to make trouble.

What did Bahrain have to say to account for their destruction of dozens of Shiite Mosques?  Oh, they had to destroy them as the Mosques had been built without building permission….

What did the Syrian government spokeswoman have to say to account for the thousands of their citizens who had fled to Turkey? Oh, they were just visiting friends and relatives. Yes, really, I heard her say it with own ears…..

Things are becoming so insane that you start to think that the stoning to death of an adulterous woman in Iran is semi-civilised by comparison.

And our wonderful UN ‘Allies’ in Russia and China refuse to even support a UN resolution that merely condemns what is going on in Syria. No one is asking them to support any kind of military or even humanitarian action; just to simply support a statement of condemnation for the unbelievably cruel and barbarous events that are going on there.

And why do they refuse? Well, apart from their natural antipathy for anything that is proposed or supported by the Yanks, they do not wish to condemn what is going on in Syria because they themselves, (the Russians and the Chinese), have resorted to such measures on their own people in the past. Further, they may well need to do so again at some time in the future. So the last thing they wish to do is to condemn repressive measures that they actually regard as ‘effective weapons’ in their own countries.

BUTT….BUTT…..BUTT….

3 thoughts on “The Darkside Blogger in a Lakeside World of Turns, Tricks and Reflections.”

  1. knickers in a twist? not really. I enjoy your blog and it’s one of my first morning reads. these emails take ten minutes, if that. no need for things to get nasty. i never understood why bloggers almost invariably end up throwing ad hominem attacks at each other.

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  2. Hi Mobi

    I’m glad that I can make you happy. You’ve done the same for me by serving up a few slam dunks. Let’s start with this statement:

    “but frankly, if you really believe that American manufactures produce superior cars to Europe and Japan then I’m afraid that you are living in cloud”

    Now Mobi, did I say that? My comment was simply that there is far more parity than you suggested with your following hyperbole from your earlier message regarding “far superior cars”:

    “they weren’t bothered as they were all running far better and more efficient business with far superior cars, than their American rivals.”

    If you read again, you’ll see I never stated that American manufacturers produce superior cards to Europe and Japan. I, too, had a BMW during my last few years in the US. Ford was able to make a decent run with Jaguar for a few years but it was understandable why they threw in the towel.

    Then there’s this on the subject of Toyota’s recalls:

    “Frankly, I think this whole business of ‘recalls’ became totally out of hand and was grossly over-cooked due the litigious nature of the American market and their desperation to grab at any opportunity to ‘rubbish’ their foreign competitors.”

    And

    “Did you hear the rest of the world complaining about faults in these very same models? Was there a similar massive recall? Of course not ”

    I think you mean “Of course!”. These recent recalls were worldwide – even in Japan! Here’s just one for 470,000 vehicles http://www.leftlanenews.com/toyota-recalls-470000-vehicles-in-japan.html. And you can honestly say with a straight face that recalls don’t have anything to do with reliability or overall quality? You’re taking inductive reasoning to new heights with this one.

    Then you move on with this question:

    “does that mean that the Japanese models are inferior to their American equivalent?”

    Again, obviously not and I didn’t suggest as much as you’d see if you reread my comment.

    Then you tossed up this one:

    “What would the Yanks do if the Japanese government attempted to bail out the Japanese auto makers IN AMERICA”

    They’d be ecstatic! Think that one through a little more carefully. Such a bailout would represent foreign direct investment in the US and would support US jobs. As I’m sure you know, FDI is the holy grail of every national economy.

    Then we have

    “Pray show me, where in my blog did I make any claim that the Brits make better cars than the Yanks?”

    You didn’t, and I never claimed you did (just as I never claimed that the Yanks make better cars than the Europeans or the Japanese). We’ve went a little too far afield here. Getting back to the original point, Obama made a claim about the US building the best autos or something to that effect to auto workers in Toledo (the origins of your rant). You mention that you’d be willing to criticize any such statements from the UK, how about this one from Cameron to his fellow Tories http://archbishop-cranmer.blogspot.com/2011/03/david-camerons-speech-to-conservative.html:

    “I know that this country can out-compete, out-perform, out-hustle the best in the world…”

    Really Dave? Out-compete and out-perform the best in the world? And I wonder if Dave really wants the UK to be the country that “out-hustles” the best in the world. This popped up in seconds after a simple Google search, so there’s likely to be many many more examples of UK politicians engaging in hyperbole to rally the troops. Where’s the humility? You should have a field day with this one, Mobi.

    As for the superiority of British cars from 50 years back, you do provide an impressive list of ‘specialty’ cars (the vast majority of whose companies have either gone bankrupt or been purchased by the Yanks, Germans or Indians). The US industry, however, has always been more geared to mass production, not stuff for the F1 circuit – there was simply no interest in that (instead, there is a much greater focus on the extremely tedious NASCAR stock car circuit). I remember when F1 would occasionally come to the US and meet with little interest. In any event, we’re talking about the here and now (as Obama was doing), in particular addressing your concern about how US politicians engage in a bit of hyperbole. Sticking with the here and now, you make my point quite nicely and I’m glad we are in agreement: ”The British car industry has long since folded and I would never dream of making claims that they still make world beating cars”. However, Dave doesn’t seem to agree with you, given his statement above. Care to have a go at him?

    Instead of looking at the MITI study you refer to (and failed to quote), which is an exercise in ambiguity based on the lack of details you provided (and which is why it is laughable), how about taking a look at the number of successful international patent applications? You’ll find that as recently as 2005 the US had far more successful filings when compared to the UK, even after adjusting for the much smaller UK economy.

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    1. Dear Skippy,

      You do seem to have got your knickers into a bit of a twist over all of this, haven’t you.

      If I had endless hours to spare in refuting your comments, point, by point, I might be inclined to do so, but even the indolent Mobi does have other stuff to do, including moving onwards and upwards; directing my efforts in trying to write newer, fresher stuff, rather than continually raking over the coals of debates that have past their ‘sell by dates’.

      I’ve had two ‘gos’ and you’ve had two ‘gos’ , so lets leave it at that, or it might start to get nasty ☺

      A draw 2:2…. and…as Bill O’Reilly says, I let you have the last word – now, I can’t do fairer than that, can I?

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