22nd April, 2011 – At home by Lake Mabprachan, East Pattaya

3 Months, 22 Days – still sober

After my small ‘wobble’ of a few days back I am now feeling confident and very strong about my abstinence.

Things had been going along so well that the slightest suggestion that everything may not be as it seems, was enough to upset the apple cart, ever so slightly. But as I have already blogged, I soon realised how foolish this was and am now feeling more positive than ever. Relations with little Noo are excellent; she continues to pleasantly surprise me in so many ways. She is very likely to be the best thing that has happened to me in my life, but I will still continue to take it day by day.

To those of you who are already convinced that she is having a ‘bit on the side’, all I would ask of  you is to consider that after all these years of living with Thai women, and knowing and understanding their predilection for lying  and treachery, don’t you think I would be able to spot the signs? If you read my ‘stories’ you will see that I always strongly suspected what was going on with my women, almost from the start, but my perverse, drunken nature refused to accept it as a ‘fait a complis’ and I tried to change my women. But I never lost sight of the fact that they were up to no good.  

I am continually reassessing my life and what I am doing with it. Some days I feel I could so much more and on other days, I feel that ‘Rome wasn’t built in a day’ and with still less than  4 months sobriety under my belt I shouldn’t expect miracles. The guys in AA say that it takes a minimum of 12 months for an alcoholic to totally rid his body and mind of the effects of a lifetime of drinking. They advise not to make any long term plans or life changing decisions during the first year of sobriety. I don’t know how true this is , but sometimes I feel that I am beating myself up unnecessarily when I worry about not doing more in my life – particularly with regards to taking exercise which is essential for my future health and wellbeing.

What Mobi Did

Yesterday I spent most of the afternoon in Pattaya with Noo and her son, shopping and having some disgusting , but delicious Pizzas. It was early evening when we returned home and  I realised that my poor Cookie was so overweight and creaky on her front legs that it was time to take her in hand. We loaded her in the car and drove around the lake to a convenient spot, let her out and sent her swimming for the first time in many years. Swimming is the best exercise for her as, like us, it puts the minimum strain on her legs while allowing her to exercise the joints. Cookie absolute adores her swimming, and the three of us watched lovingly as she chased and retrieved small pieces of wood that we threw into the water for her to collect. There was one particularly amusing moment when Cookie lost sight of the floating wood we had thrown in and retrieved a floating plastic bottle instead. As she swam toward the shore she seems to be making slow progress and when she final landed the bottle, we saw the reason why. It had been tied to an enormous piece of rock and the poor mut had not only swum back with the bottle, she had also dragged the piece of rock, which weighed a ton! (well, not quite…..)

We played for around 15 minutes and then I decided that Cookie had enough and we brought her back home. She was completely exhausted and lay in virtually the same position for hours. When tried to get her to walk she was clearly in pain and I worried that I had made things worse. But this morning she was walking quite well, not really favouring her front legs at all, so I think the exercise worked – I hope so. I will try to take her swimming regularly and have put her on a strict diet to get her weight down. I hope it works.

Pakistan (continued)

In June 2002, Mukhtar Mai, now 40, was gang raped on the orders of a village council in Punjab province as punishment, after her younger brother was wrongly accused of having illicit relations with a woman from a rival clan. The boy was 12-years-old at the time and villagers say he was merely seen walking with the girl.

After Mai resisted the urge to commit suicide, (the usual consequence of such an outrage) , she decided to face her accusers and seek justice. The resultant publicity led to arrest of the men in question and a local court sentenced the six accused men to death. But a High Court in Lahore subsequently acquitted five of the men in March 2005, and commuted the sentence for the main accused, Abdul Khaliq, to life imprisonment. Yesterday, Pakistan’s Supreme Court dismissed an appeal by gang rape victim, Mai, against the acquittal of the five men

According to an internationally respected  Foundation, working for the protection of women in Pakistan, almost a thousand women were raped in the country during 2010, while more than 2,000 were abducted and almost 1,500 murdered,

A further 500 were the victims of “honour killings”, a custom under which relatives and other fellow tribesmen kill a woman if they believe she had an affair.

Admiral Mike Mullen, chairman of the United States Joint Chiefs of Staff, has stated categorically that Pakistan’s Inter-Services Intelligence agency (ISI) had maintained a relationship with the Haqqani network – one of the deadliest factions in the Taliban’s Afghan insurgency.

During a visit to Pakistan on Wednesday, Admiral Mullen said:

“Continuing links between the ISI and the Haqqani network, which attacks Nato troops in Afghanistan from safe havens in North Waziristan, are a cause of “continuing strain” in relations between the two countries.

“Haqqani is supporting, funding, training fighters that are killing Americans and killing coalition partners. And I have a sacred obligation to do all I can to make sure that doesn’t happen,”

The Pakistan Army has accused the United States of waging a campaign of “negative propaganda” over its role in the war on al-Qaeda and Taliban militants.

Chief of army staff, General Ashfaq Kayani was quoted as rejecting criticism of its commitment to fighting militants.

“The Pakistan army’s on-going operations are a testimony of our national resolve to defeat terrorism. He, (Kayani), strongly rejected negative propaganda of Pakistan not doing enough and Pakistan army’s lack of clarity on the way forward.”

Ties between Pakistan intelligence and Haqqani are not exactly a secret.  In an intercepted phone call, General Kayani once described the elder Haqqani as a “strategic asset.”

I have been accused of making simplistic statements on world events. That may well be true, because sometimes the simplest thoughts and the simplest solutions to the events that are destroying this world will maybe one day turn out to be the only ones that will work.

As long as we have to listen to the obfuscation, hypocrisy and downright lies, to say nothing of the actions of sheer evil by people who are supposed to be our allies, then I can see nothing but pain and increasing strife on this troubled planet.

My ideas are ‘simplistic’ because I advocate an immediate abandonment of places such as Afghanistan and its terrorism surrogate, Pakistan.  Afghanistan – a country where the populace rises up and kills indiscriminately, because some nutcase on the other side of the world burns a Koran. Pakistan; where innocent women are regularly gang- raped, beaten and burned alive and where the courts are powerless to stop it. Pakistan, where any criticism of the Koran is punishable by death and where anyone wishing to amend such laws is also murdered by death squads who act with total impunity and are above the law.

I could go on and on.

So it’s simplistic to say: ‘Get the hell out of there and leave them to it’ is it? Well our present policies have singularly failed to work for decades and all that the west has succeed in doing is wasting billions of dollars, causing  the deaths of countless members of our brave  fighting forces, and becoming the focus for deep seated hatred by a vast majority of Muslims in this world.

So would our withdrawal from this conflict make matters any worse, I ask you? Sure there would be many adverse knock on effects of such a plan, but whatever might happen, could it really be any worse that the intractable situation we find ourselves in today? All those billions that we have committed to Pakistan, Afghanistan and other trouble spots could be used to bolster our defences against terrorist outrages and root out the insurgents within our own society.

I don’t pretend to have all the answers, but at least I am thinking ‘outside the box’. If more people could be encouraged to think the way I do, maybe one day, our leaders will start to see sense and start to plan an exit strategy from these far flung, Muslim- radicalised countries, which no amount of western money, lives and dedication is ever going to fix – at least not by us. We are the very devil- incarnate to them – how on earth can we imagine that they will ever listen to us and do what we say?


6 thoughts on “22nd April, 2011 – At home by Lake Mabprachan, East Pattaya”

  1. Mobi,
    I must concur with Mobi Fan on the subject of Noo. All alcoholics (myself included) have problems being honest with themselves, especially when not treating the alcoholism and trying to abstain on self (will) power. (Dry drunk).

    Most all alcoholics have a trait which is a common. They are by nature, self-seeking and selfish. They want their cake, to eat it too and have a few more in the fridge for tomorrow meanwhile never sharing it with others. It’s to cheat and stray, but not for the other partner. Things always are focused toward self satisfaction without regard for others. It’s a common trait the first 100 that wrote the AA big book found to be the core of their problem.

    Alcoholics fool themselves, they might pay for romantic partners and then have a fantasy that it is a real romantic relationship rather than the business arrangement it is. They have a propensity to fool themselves. Most real alcoholics with out exception have a spiritual malady which requires a spiritual overhaul / solution.

    Though I hope you never drink, it sounds to me like you are about as far from a drink now as you were a couple days after your last. I fear that if you don’t treat your alcoholism somehow (with AA or some other drastic spiritual measure) alcoholism will get the best of you.


  2. Happy Easter Mobi, It doesn’t matter to me who or what you believe in.

    What matters, is you do the best you can with what you have to work with.

    Some days are better than others for all of us too.


  3. Hi Mobi.
    I am so happy that you are still abstaining and getting things together.
    The novel is coming on great. That rewrite of the last chapter was a big improvement. The prose flowed much better. Its a gripping story and you are telling it brilliantly well.

    Regarding your pin up photos. I realise that photography is a hobby of yours and some images of beautiful women are very enjoyable for many of us. But adding them to your blog has rather confused and diluted the power of the words. I know you want more hits and presumably you have been successful in that objective. But the addition of random pin up pics seems a bit lo-so to me. You are emulating the Sun and its marketing. Are you a Murdoch fan?

    If the pictures were all taken by yourself and you added a few words about the model and the encounter then it would be in a different class altogether and greatly enhance your blog. As it is, the pictures are certainly enjoyable but rather irrelevant to your own story.

    On a more serious note, may I comment on your Noo relationship. Why, I wonder, do you expect fidelity from a working girl. She is doing a job for you and doing it exceptionally well. You pay her and you should both be happy.
    In the nature of things, she will be wondering how to make herself more secure and and at the same time keeping her options open in case the fickle farang employer finds someone new.
    You, meanwhile are enjoying her companionship in every way yet still feel the need to play with other ladies.In equity, is she not entitled to also play with other companions who she can communicate with much better and enjoy their youth and vitality?

    You have had a rumbustious and long career as a monger which you say gives you insight into your relationship.
    I ask you the question that management consultants pose to old seasoned managers who claim to have 20 years experience. ‘Have you had 20 years experience, or have you had 1 years experience twenty times?’

    Hookers hook. That’s what they do for a living.


    1. Thank you for you comments on my novel; I have taken another break but hope to get back into it sometime this week.

      I have responded to your point about the pics in my blog. We are all entitled to our own views.

      You are wrong about Noo. You don’t know her – I do.

      Actually, as far as Thai whores are concerned I have had over 35 years of experience.

      You are wrong and your views on this subject are far too simplistic, as countless others can attest to.

      Some Hookers merely hook and others are looking for a way out and a better life. Much depends on how long they have been hooking, their background, (by that I mean a loving home or a demanding unhappy home) and much else besides.

      Maybe I will write about all this quite soon, but if you read the opening chapters of my novel you would surely be in no doubt about my knowledge and first hand experience of hookers who just hook and why they do what they do.


  4. Mobi,
    In early sobriety I remember my emotions especially around dating and relationships were quite vulnerable. I dated a woman who, at the time, I regarded as quite a catch. At 3 years sobriety I hadn’t really been enlarging my spiritual life as I should have and, although I didn’t drink, I was quite upset when after a couple dates, this catch of a woman didn’t return my calls. I got quite out of sorts and felt in tangles. Had a really been working the program as I do now I’m fairly certain I may not have even dated her as there were some “things” about her I would have seen, being spiritually fit, instead of being blinded by desire as I was.

    This notion of an alcoholic needing a year to “get his sober legs” is some kind of wives tail in AA. The literature never mentions it. Bluntly, it is BS.

    The literature, over and over quite frankly spells out the instructions for attaining a spiritual awakening and connection with a higher power, for this is the solution AA puts forth. Both Bill W. and Dr. Bob achieved their spiritual awakenings quite soon after practicing the principals such as the needed amends and confession of ones personality defects to God and another. Alcoholics whole heartedly availing themselves of the practical program of action (12 steps) can have the sustained and lasting abstinence as well as the serenity and peace of mind that come from a spiritual awakening and connection with God. After this has occured one doesn’t feel every “wobbly” One is transformed …. hope that helps..



  5. Heya thank you for modernizing ones web page, last but not least I will write-up some sort of review!! We constantly eye your issues along with wanted to tell you it is wonderful.


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