Jomtien, 7th April, 2010
07 Apr 2010 22 Comments
in 1
It makes me very sad to learn how evil and vindictive people can be.
I have just received the following email to my Mobi email blog address from a guy named Mario.
Mario Decanio
“The truth about Wan………….
She would have gone off with anyone that was stupid enough to pay the nar the night you met her, yet you think that she has been waiting for you all your life, it’s quite pitiful really
Wan is a whore, thats what she was doing in Pattaya you silly old fooll you really belive any fucking thing anybody tells you don’t you ?
That’s why your life has been, and still is, a total fucking disaster
Would I ever have a problem telling you to your face what I typed on here, you must be fucking joking. I’m 30 years younger than you and fit as a fiddle, what you gonna do, stumble into me, breathe on me, get some Thai guys onto me ?
Bring it on old man, I know who you are, I know your house in Pong, I know your Car, I even fucking know who you are big nose, still drink coffee in Carrefour ?
And I fucked Dang after she finished in her hair salon near Tops supermarket one night, and let me tell you, she was a fucking useless fuck, but at least she swallowed my semen.
She had a Honda Jazz and was telling me about her old drunken husband that had put a 20 million baht house in her name, bought her everything, and let her fuck anyone she wanted to because he was always too drunk to raise a hard on.
I never believed her because I doubted anybody could be so stupid, but obviously you fit that bill.
Anyway, she went with me to The Full Love Inn Just off Soi Bongkot, I left after 90 Minutes as she was a boring drunken bitch, hey , guess what, she ( You ) even paid for the room…lol.
I only went in her shop to ask for a haircut, amazing Pattaya.
Stop feeling so sorry for yourself, you date whores and expect what exactly ?
Oh I forgot Wan isn’t a whore, you just happened to meet her in a bar, haha. Pathetic
I hope she rips you off big time.
And should you go back to Dang, well, Dang would like it, you pay for everything and she fucks everyone in sight, you should have married her mother instead, shes still younger than you and would never have given you the problems sweet Dang did.
I shouldn’t really tell you this but, she said she was as bored as hell with you and it was like fucking her grandfather when she had to have sex with you.
Her words, not mine.
Good luck with Wan, shes probably fucked half of Pattaya already. Oh no, she hates Pattaya, that’s right. lol.
Pete met her in a market, yeah right, of course he did, hahaha”
I don’t doubt that he is right about Dang, as I have said as much in my blogs over he past nine months, although I suspect there is some exaggeration in his account, just to make me feel even worse.
But he is way off line with Wan.
I won’t comment any more just now.
I know there are some cunts in the world, but I would never have believed that anyone could try to be so vindictive and hurtful to someone – who he had never met and who had never done him any harm.
What makes people so malevolent?
Sometimes I despair of humanity.
I hope you are proud of yourself Mario…..
Jomtien, 6th April, 2010
06 Apr 2010 10 Comments
in 1
Last Thursday evening, Bob flew in from Saigon to spend a few days in Thailand so I drove to the airport to pick him up, then back to Pattaya for one night before driving to Bangkok on Friday to spend a couple of days with Dave.
I checked Bob into a cheap Hotel just down the road from my condo and we went to a lovely little restaurant, with real table cloths, and an excellent ambience that cooks the most incredible steaks, at very reasonable prices.
They also have good selection of wine, and as both of us are wine lovers – we got stuck in.
Bob pretty much only ever drinks wine, and although I also love wine, I hadn’t had any for quite a few months as once I start I find it very difficult to stop.
And so it proved to be the case.
The wine slid down our throats as though we hadn’t had a drink in years.
We started off with a carafe of chilled white wine, followed by a bottle of red with the meal, then another carafe of white to finish off with outside, as Bob likes to indulge himself with a cigar.
As ever the steaks were perfectly cooked and were delicious.
It was approaching midnight and we were the only customers remaining. The staff made the usual signs that they wanted to close, so we paid the bill, which was very reasonable, and adjourned to a nearby beer bar, where they had some surprisingly good red wine, which we drunk by the glass.
I don’t need to tell you that by 2.30 a.m. we were both feeling no pain, and finally decided to call it a night. Fortunately I had purposely planned our little reunion within walking distance of our respective accommodations.
It was the drunkest I had been for quite a while. Wan, bless her, didn’t utter a word of censure, but simply asked me sweetly why I had come home so late.
The three of us, Bob, Wan and me, had planned an early start the next morning, but of course it didn’t materialize, and we finally got on the road to Bangkok around noon. I was still very hung over and feeling like shit, but Bob seemed to have shaken off the after effects of his alcohol excesses.
(Mind you, I did confess to Bob on the journey to Bangkok, (and now to you, my readers), that after I left him, I had a few whisky night caps in my little Go-Go bar, just down the road from the beer bar, which some of you may recall from an earlier blog and another failed relationship).
So we checked into our hotel and made our way by taxi to Dave’s house on Soi forty nine.
Since I last saw Dave, some of his friends have given him a new nickname – Lazarus, the one that Jesus allegedly raised from the dead.
There is absolutely no question that Dave is an extremely fortunate human being and his genes must be incredible. I have mentioned before that both Dave’s parents lived well into their nineties and in spite of everything that Dave has done to destroy his body, it seems to defy medical science by continuing to function.
Dave was enormously overweight, never takes any exercise, has chain smoked all his adult life, has drunk like a fish for countless years, yet the doctors say that his heart is as strong as an ox, his blood pressure is normal, and his lungs are in pretty reasonable shape.
The guy who christened him ‘Lazarus’ told me that when he and another friend visited Dave a few weeks ago, they were both convinced he had only days to live and that they would never see him alive again.
Certainly the doctors who admitted Dave to hospital four weeks ago have told him that he was within an inch of death and if he hadn’t been brought in on that day, he would have surely died.
Yet last Friday, Dave was up and about, had lost a fair bit of weight, was eating well, and his brain – which everyone was so concerned about – was almost back to normal and he was able to discuss complex subjects in his normal intelligent manner.
Of course he is still weak, and walks with the aid of a stick, and has to rest frequently, but the fact remains that he is once more recovering, and the doctors say that even his liver is starting to repair itself.
He was fit enough to go out with us no less than three times. On two of the occasions for an evening meal at his favourite restaurants, and on Saturday afternoon Bob took him to a music shop where his bought himself an acoustic guitar and some bongos.
Dave finally understands and accepts that he can never drink again. He also understands that he has to ’work’ on staying sober, and part of this process is to try and change his life and daily routines so that he isn’t reminded of booze.
The musical instruments are part of this plan. (Those of you who haven’t followed Dave’s story from the start, I will just reiterate Dave was a professional musician and it was as a musician that he first came to Thailand, way back in 1971.)
He is a bit of an ‘all rounder’ and can play many instruments, but the drums are his main thing, so he now wants to improve his guitar playing skills and write some new music.
So of course we encouraged him to do anything that will increase his chances of staying sober. We had very long chats about just about everything, and there is no doubt that Dave is going to give this thing his best shot. If he fails this time, it will not be for want of trying.
I give him a 50% chance of succeeding, for I know personally how hard it is to maintain over the long haul, and I know of so many who have failed, especially without the support of an organization, such as the AA.
We can only hope and pray and see what transpires. Dave’s father was also a hopeless alcoholic, and he managed to quit when he was in his sixties and he lived to over ninety, never picking up another drink. So who knows?
Bob and I will continue to keep in regular touch and give Dave whatever support we are able to. Bob will return to Bangkok next month and we will spend another weekend with Dave in Bangkok.
I didn’t drink in Dave’s presence when I was in Bangkok, but I did sneak into a few bars and have a few drinks when I was alone. In fact on Saturday afternoon I was a bit pissed, but as I was unable to drink in the evening when I was with Dave, the effects wore off before I went to bed.
Back in Jomtien on Sunday afternoon, I had a few beers and I could sense that I was starting to lose control of my drinking. I feared it wouldn’t be long before it became out of control yet again. My increased drinking was probably the main reason why I became so upset at the personal attacks on me in my blog.
As the days pass I am realizing that I totally overreacted to the “nasty” comments.
It was entirely my choice to allow comments, and I know from my internet forum experiences that there are some vicious people out there who delight in trying to hurt people and who often try to twist words that have been written to their own purposes.
I guess my state of mind was not good when the comments came flying in and I got far more wound up than was healthy for me, as you will see.
I haven’t made a final decision yet about my blog. I have been thinking about closing it down for a while now, before all the nasty comments started, as I do wonder if it is all worth it just for two hundred odd readers. But for now it will continue. I am going to Roi Et for Songkran, and I won’t have much to do if I don’t continue with my blog during the next few weeks, so the ultimate decision will be postponed for a while.
I do believe that overall, my writing has been therapeutic, and has taught me a lot about myself that I hadn’t quite appreciated before, so maybe for this reason alone it is worth continuing.
If nothing else it has made me see very clearly that I do have some severe behavioural or maybe even mental problems and that I can be extremely self destructive.
Yesterday Dang called me and asked me to buy some dog food for my two Shih Tzus. I agreed to drop the food by at seven p.m. but she called me later to ask if I could change the time to eight as she was working late.
I decided to have a couple of beers on the way, and arrived just after the agreed time.
I know now that I don’t love Dang any more. I felt nothing when I saw her, and in a strange way I think it was the first time saw her in her real light, and not through the twisted, sometimes ‘rose tinted’ glasses, that I used to see her with.
She is almost thirty three and is starting to lose her looks. Her face looks tired and a bit old, and she has put on a lot of weight. Her hour glass figure, and beautiful legs were her best features, but these ‘assets’ are fading quickly. I really believe that she can no longer entice me back in the manner that she has done so many times in the past
The dogs went crazy and Dang repeated her offer to let me have the dogs whenever I had a place to keep them.
She was alone and we had a very long chat. Our talk was completely lacking in rancour and was probably the most open and honest chat that we have ever had.
Dang also repeated her offer for me to move back in the house, assuring me that we could live there together but have separate lives and that way I could enjoy my house and save money on renting another property.
I asked her if this offer was good until we sold the house, and she replied that it was up to me. I could stay there forever if I wanted to. She said she didn’t want any more money from me and was determined to pay her way for the rest of her life. She was making good money freelancing as a hairdresser in Bangkok and Pattaya, and hoped to open her own salon within the next couple of months.
She initially said that I could bring women back to the house to sleep with, as long as they left in the morning and didn’t move in, but later she changed her mind about this when I told her a little bit about Wan.
The only condition (apart from not bringing whores back) that she insisted on was that I allowed her cousin and son to stay there during school term time. (The cousin looks after the son, who is now thirteen and he would require minimal attention from me.). She said that if I moved back, she would come and go, sometimes staying there and sometimes staying in Pattaya or Bangkok. She said she might even move out completely.
We left it at that, and I told her I would think about it. There is no rush as I still have six months remaining on my condo.
I drove back to Jomtien and decided to go on a binge. I was feeling a bit confused from from my discussions with Dang. I was also a bit upset at Wan, because she had called me several times when I was talking to Dang. I realised that she was understandably concerned about me visiting my estranged wife, but she wasn’t going to improve matters by continually calling me.
I got pretty plastered and staggered home at around 3 a.m.
Wan was upset but didn’t scold me or fight me. She is a very sweet lady and every day that passes I appreciate her more and more.
Today I have been a mess and didn’t even get out of bed until three this afternoon. I’m feeling a bit better now (nine fifteen) and I have asked Wan to try and help me quit drinking.
I am going to give it one more go, and when I get back from Roi Et I will start the meetings again. At least they get me into a good routine.
Mobi’s dilemma
As I wrote yesterday, I believe I am approaching an important crossroads in my life.
I seem to have two distinctly different ways forward.
The first is to stay with Wan and Jasper which would mean that some time in the next six months, pack up my things and move in with her at her house in Roi Et.
We have discussed this many times now and she has many convincing arguments why I should give up on my suggestion of renting a house and having her and Jasper move to Pattaya.
I think if ‘push came to shove’ she would probably agree to do this, but I know she is totally against it in her heart, and she would never be happy here. She wants to be at her home, with her family, dogs, and garden.
To be honest, there are some very compelling reasons why we should indeed move to Roi Et, not least of which is the money I will save, and the fact that Jasper’s schooling would be much more satisfactory. Wan has said that she has plenty of land, and if I wished it would be relatively cheap to extend the house to accommodate all my stuff, and I could even build a small office, which would be a great idea.
The other way forward is to take up Dang’s offer and move back home.
This would also be a cheaper alternative to renting a house and moving Wan to Pattaya, but of course I wouldn’t be able to move Wan into my house, so that would mean I would have to give her up.
One of my concerns with staying with Wan, is that I may go off the rails one day and destroy her life again, and that would be terrible.
If I give her up and return to my house, what will I do with my life? OK I will be happy at home and be able to relax in relative luxury, play with the dogs, use the pool and so on, but what then?
I can’t have a permanent live-in, and maybe that would be a blessing in disguise, but I know I would be lonely, and loneliness for me inevitably leads to bars and whores.
One of the most interesting things Dang said to me was when I asked her what bedroom she was sleeping in. When we were together and I went away on a trip, Dang would never sleep alone in the master bedroom. She would always sleep downstairs in the spare room, usually with her son.
So she surprised me when she said that she slept alone in the master bedroom. I asked her about it, and she said that when she knew I had left her for good she made up her mind that she had to take control of her life. She said that she was determined to sleep in that room, because if she didn’t it would be a sign of weakness.
I asked her if she felt lonely sleeping alone in that huge bedroom and she looked at me and said:
“Yes, I was very lonely for the first five months, but I was determined to stay there and conquer my loneliness, and slowly it started to get better. Now, I am quite happy to spend hours there there alone. I sleep well and in the daytime if I am home I watch the bedroom television.
Maybe I have something to learn from this.
Anyway, I will go to Roi Et with Wan and the kids and stay there for at least two weeks. Then I will return to Pattaya, almost certainly alone for a while, and see how I feel about things.
I don’t have to make any decisions quite yet, but if I do decide to go back to my home, then I should make that decision sooner rather than later, for Wan’s sake
Tomorrow I will be busy sorting out things for my forthcoming journey, and Thursday I will be doing the eight hour drive, so don’t expect any new blogs before Friday at the earliest.
As soon as I get To Roi Et, I will get back into “Mardie”, finish it off and probably start a new Vignette.
Jomtien,5th April, 2010
05 Apr 2010 4 Comments
in 1
I would like to thank all those who have commented on my blog, including those who have supported me, and also to those who continue to find fault.
It has been a salutary experience and I feel bad about removing the comments from ‘Mick’, ‘Lloyd’ and ‘Someone’ from my blog.
I didn’t want to do it, but the comments were becoming extremely hostile and personal. Abusive language was starting to slip in so I’m afraid it was all getting too much.
May I respectively suggest that before anyone sits down and writes a critique of me, my behaviour or my actions, just ask yourself if you would be prepared to tell me to my face what you have written on paper. If the answer is honestly “yes”, then please go ahead, but I will not tolerate abusive language or gratuitous personal insults.
I seem to be moving ever closer to a critical “crossroads “ in my life and at this point I cannot predict the outcome.
Tonight I will be seeing Dang at my house and we will talk about things.
On Thursday I am scheduled to take Wan, Jasper and Sherry back to Roi Et where the plan is for me to stay until after Songkran, a period of at least two weeks.
I am still drinking, but never to excess, and I am also trying to decide whether to give sobriety another go, or just give up and see if I can drink in moderation.
And last but not least, I am considering whether to continue with this blog. Some of the comments have upset me more than they should have done, and I know this is all due to my unstable state of mind. In the past I would have relished the cut and thrust of ‘internet battle’, but these days it just seems to get to me.
Maybe it would be better to call it a day. Although there have been a few days when I attracted nearly a thousand views, for the most part I have averaged around two hundred hits a day.
Frankly, I am disappointed that during the past nine months I haven’t built up a greater readership. I know, it is all down to me, but there is no point devoting all this time and energy in writing a blog if so few people read it.
I like to consider myself an author, and every author needs someone to read what he writes. But two hundred odd readers is very little return for all the effort.
So I will continue to ponder this, along with the other issues that need to be decided in my life.
Jomtien, 4th April, 2010
04 Apr 2010 11 Comments
in 1
I have spent the last three days in Bangkok with Bob, Dave and Wan and returned late this afternoon.
I will catch up on what’s been happening in my life tomorrow – God willing.
Right now, I will deal with some irritating attacks on Mobi’s integrity.
Of BMW’s, White Van man, and sms’s.
My oh my! I do seem to have stirred up a hornet’s nest with some of my dedicated readers, who are so dedicated to taking offence that they never bother to read carefully what I have written and accuse me of all kinds of dastardly crimes, and God knows what else!
I must say the funniest criticism was from the guy who said I could call Pete a “cunt” or even worse, (maybe: a “bastard”, a “shit face”, a “Holy Mother fucker” or even the “spawn of the devil incarnate”), but may God forgive me if I stoop so low as to disparage him by accusing him of being – horror upon horror, may my soul rot in Hell – a “White Van Man!!!!”.
I mean…. Really! We are talking about a man who has intimidated his wife for three years, abused her in the worst possible manner, has threatened destruction of her property, (arson) and even threatened murder.
And what did poor Mobi do? Try to make him feel a bit small by calling him a “White Van man”. Oh my God! Anything but that! If I was England I’d probably be hung drawn and quartered and cast into a pit full of ravenous wolves for committing such a dastardly sin.
I said it because I suspected to cowardly little weasel of a bully might be a bit upset. I might just have been right.
Now let’s get this clear. I used that epithet because I knew he would not like it, just the same as in past I have called other ‘wankers’ things like: “Jumped up Hooray Henry’s”, because I knew that the particular appellation fitted the bill, and so on. I use whatever it takes to achieve the desired result.
If you read my story, you will know that I came from humble beginnings and was brought up in an East London council flat by a monster of a father who didn’t do a day’s work for most of his married life and we lived just above the poverty line.
I came from nothing and achieved something, before women and booze got the better of me. I have little to be proud of and I have no feelings whatsoever, one way or another, about white van men. I am sure many of them are hard working, decent men who are not cowardly bullies and take proper care of their families, and good luck to them.
I have no idea why some of you immediately jump on your high horses and castigate me for looking down on these White Van Men – because I don’t and never have and have already stated this several times in my blog.
So gentlemen, please read what I say - before flaming me.
Now to the beamer. I have driven beamers for most of my life and love them. That is one of my things. I like driving beautiful fast cars and get great pleasure from it. Others will say that there a much better, faster cars than beamers, and they are probably right, but my love is the beamer.
When I came back to Thailand, I first had a Ford Escape, then a Fortuner, and then decided that I wanted a decent car – something a bit different. I test drove a new Toyota Camry, a Honda Accord a Nissan Teana among others. The Accord was closest to what I wanted, and I almost placed an order, when on whim I popped into the BMW showroom and had a run in the new BMW 320D.
I was immediately sold. It is a wonderful piece of German machinery, and I absolutely love driving it. I thought long and hard about the high price, but decided, if I could afford it, then why not indulge myself?
I have never regretted it for one moment, even though my finances since have taken a severe nose dive, and if I was choosing new car now I would never buy something so expensive.
It is a great, fun machine, with incredible acceleration, the best braking system I have ever had on a vehicle, small enough to navigate the narrowest sois, yet big enough to accommodate 5 adults comfortably, with a surprisingly large boot.
I can accelerate my way out of problems on the road, and I can stop on a sixpence, and with airbags all over the place it is one of the safest vehicles on the road.
OF course there is a “bling” factor – I would be lying if I didn’t admit it. But apart from impressing the girls, (who then ask for more money!), and being generally waved on by the cops at road blocks, I really don’t give a fuck about who is or isn’t impressed. That is not why I bought it. I bought it because I love Beamers, and I enjoy driving them. I’m just telling you the way it is.
Yes, many Thais are impressed when they see it, and tell me so. So what? I didn’t say that it made me “feel good” did I? I was simply stating a fact. I didn’t suggest that people should think better of me because I own a BMW, did I? But every time I mention that I have a beamer, someone immediately takes umbrage; all these envious little farangs driving their Honda motorcycles and second hand Jazz’s come out of the woodwork, spitting bile, and writing such invective as:
“If you really get off on people smiling at you because of the car you drive you’re a sadder, lonelier person than I thought. Pathetic doesn’t come close.”
and:
“but thinking they like or respect you or that you are a decent person simply because someone looks at your car is fooling yourself.”
Sadly to say I am not jealous as I would not bother with a BMW, my wife and I don’t need status symbols to appreciate the lifestyle we have.
So, Messrs “Lloyd” and “Someone”, pray show me where I said : “I get off on people smiling at me”?
I simply told you what happened – I didn’t say what my reaction was, because it wasn’t relevant, but you immediately jumped to the conclusion that I sitting there enjoying the compliments. I actually think they are a bit pathetic, but I don’t really give a shit one way or another what they say or think. I have been round the block too many times to take much notice of such ignorant behaviour.
And where did I claim that “people like or respect me or that I am a decent person”? You are simply putting words into my mouth that I never wrote, but you seem to be so consumed by your feelings of inadequacy and jealousy,as soon as I mention the BMW, I can only assume that you instantly start to hate me and everything you think I represent.
I never dreamt that my blog would generate so much resentment and nasty feelings, and I am seriously considering giving up the whole thing, because I have done nothing but put my very imperfect life out there for all to see with as much honesty as I can muster. Yet, I get these hurtful flames, putting words and thoughts into my head that never existed.
Anyway, Lloyd and Someone, for my own peace of mind I will not publish any more of your comments. I just don’t need that aggravation on top of all my other problems.
As for my sms’s to Pete…..
Well… he called Wan on Friday, just before he left for the UK.
He was very polite and asked her if she would let him see Jasper when he returned to Thailand. Wan replied yes, provided he didn’t try and make any more trouble. Then he asked to speak to Jasper and Wan handed the phone over to her son and she translated for Pete in a brief chat with his son. Pete promised that he would behave in the future and thanked Wan for what she had said and done.
Pete is not going to try anything with me – he is a snivelling little coward and he thought he could bully Wan and have his own way.
He now knows he can’t and I am sure he will toe the line. I am not in the least bit scared of him, and if he ever steps out of line again then he will have me to deal with and I have my own ways of handling these situations. He is the one who needs to be worried – not me.
Post script:
I have just read Sven’s comment and as a trusted friend who I have known through the internet for a number of years, I have to say that I am at an all time low.
I now realise that this blog was not a good idea. I thought it would be therapeutic for me and maybe it might help someone along the way who may learn from my mistakes, but that was probably far too presumptuous and arrogant of me.
I have tried to be honest, hide nothing and call a “spade a spade”. But everyone immediately shits on me from a great height without even bothering to read what I have written properly.
It shows me that trying to write an honest, ‘no holds barred’, blog is a complete waste of time, because many readers will simply take what they want from it, and spit back abuse at the author, without a care in the world as to the effect that it might have on him. I feel that they sadly lack any sincerity or integrity.
I might write again, but right now I am at a cross roads in my life and it could go either way.
Wan is the most amazingly good person I have ever met in my life, and I don’t deserve her.
My alcoholism is in danger of not only taking me down, but her as well, so I may have to make some difficult decisions in the next few days.
So this may be farewell… to the blog and who knows what else…..
Signing off….
Mobi.
Jomtien, 1st April, 2010
01 Apr 2010 12 Comments
in 1
Last Monday, Wan received an sms message from Pete, her ‘ex’, in the late afternoon asking if he could see Jasper again, as he was going back to England in three days time.
Pete has been in Thailand since November last year and has only requested to see his son three times, the first was well over a month since he arrived in the country, so we wondered why he now showed a sudden interest in seeing him again before he went back to the UK.
Anyway, it would not have been possible as he was in Roi Et and we are in Pattaya, so I helped Wan pen a reply. She texted, very politely, that she was sorry it would not be possible for him to see his son as she and Jasper were away on holiday.
Pete immediately called Wan on her phone, but she declined to accept the call. She didn’t want to have a fight with him.
That was that – or so we thought.
We were drifting off to sleep at ten thirty that evening when Wan received a call from her mother, who was in a terrible state.
It transpired that Pete had gone to Wan’s village with his new girl friend and a large, ‘rough looking’ Thai man and they had barged right into Wan’s mother’s house compound, manhandled her, and demanded to see his son. This was after ten o’ clock at night.
Wan’s mother told them that Wan was not there, that she had gone to Bangkok with Jasper, but they continued to manhandle and threaten her. Pete’s girl friend told her that if Wan didn’t return straight away with her son, they would burn Wan’s house down, and then Pete told her that if he didn’t see his son on the next day, he would kill me – Mobi!
They continued to ‘bad mouth’ Wan to her mother, and Pete’s girl friend said that everything Wan possessed – her house and car – had been bought with Pete’s money, (which is not true – it was his mother who gave her the money because Pete refused to give her any, but even if it was true, so what? She was married to him until he threw her out: and what business is it of his new girl friend?), and told Wan’s mum that they would make big trouble if Pete’s son wasn’t produced on the next day.
At this point Wan’s brother-in-law emerged from the house (he was living there with Wan’s younger sister and their new born baby) and told the group to leave Wan’s mother alone and get out.
They eventually left, still shouting and making threats and demanding that Jasper be back home by five p.m. the next day.
Wan’s mother was distraught, and was crying over the phone to Wan, and Wan also started crying. She said that nothing like this had ever happened in her entire life and both of them were extremely upset.
When she calmed down I composed a text for Wan to send to Pete. She told him that she had reported his intimidation and threats to the police, and that if he returned to Wan’s or her Mother’s house, he would be arrested and would go to jail. She also told him that he had no legal right to see his son.
Pete replied and said that he didn’t care if he spent the rest of his life in “The Monkey House”. He still insisted on seeing his son.
We finally dropped off to sleep, and the next morning, Wan arranged for the village Headman to take Wan’s mother to Selaphum police station to make a report on what had happened. The police told her that if they came back again, she should call them and they would come over to the village and take care of things.
On Tuesday afternoon, Wan received another sms from Pete, asking her to confirm that she would be home within her son at five p.m.
The arrogance and sheer conceit of the man, was mind boggling. He actually believed that his ex wife and son, over whom he had no legal rights whatsoever, would be produced for him at twenty four hours notice, when they were holidaying some eight hundred kilometers away. He clearly still thought that when he shouted, Wan would jump.
It was time for me to get in on the act. This is the text I sent to him, from my phone:
“What planet were you born on? Are you stupid or do you think the whole world will listen to your bullshit? Let’s get this clear. You were an arsehole of a husband to Wan for many years. You abused her, insulted her and treated her abominably.
You are a selfish, cowardly bully. Then you find a new girl and you get rid of Wan. You divorced her and now she has full legal custody of her son. You have no rights whatsoever to see him. Yet in spite of everything, Wan talks nicely to you and lets you see her son.
Then what do you do? You call her things like “Lowlife Thai Prick “and you bully and intimidate her poor aged mother. I tell you buddy, you are the low life English prick. I’m ashamed to be from the same country as you it’s about time you crawled back into your hole
Your days of intimidating and bullying a kind, gentle Thai lady are over, and if you ever threaten her, me or her mother again you will regret it for the rest of your life. Who do you think you are, demanding that she go back home so you can see her son? You are not her God, and she owes you nothing. This is Thailand, not England, and I promise you will pay dearly for your deplorable behaviour in this country. Get smart, get out and stay out for your own good.”
It took four sms’s to send the above.
His reply was pathetic. Basically he just tried to belittle me in the only way he could think of – by attacking my age. He sent a stupid text insinuating that I was too old to have a baby and if I wanted one then he could help me.
It was truly pitiable, and I told him so.
“The mere fact that you think your stupid, crude, crass comments will in any way rile me only confirms that you are an ignorant, know-nothing, pathetic, mean spirited low class, white van man… So far you’ve been lucky in your life. It won’t last, I can promise you. Think well on what you have done in your life. I hope you are proud of yourself, because, buddy, nobody else is.”
We haven’t heard another word from him and he didn’t return to Wan’s house – no doubt taking to heart the warnings we sent to him.
There is no doubt that the man is a very mean spirited bully. Wan told me that he was so abusive when she lived in England with him, that she had to call the police in Oxford to get him to modify his behaviour.
She is convinced that Pete doesn’t really care much for Jasper, and he wouldn’t have demanded to see him if it hadn’t been for what happened at the swimming pool.
He just became very angry and jealous when he found Wan with a new man – especially one with a BMW. He never thought that Wan would find a new man, and he always assumed that he would able to come and go as he pleased and see his son whenever the mood took him. He obviously became very upset when he realised the perceived status quo was no more.
By now he should be on his way back to the UK, and hopefully that is the last we will hear from him.
